2.01.2012

Ashley from 5oh Wifey: a Real Housewife


The wonderful Ashley from 5oh Wifey: life as mommy and cop's wife is kicking off our series.
I am so blessed by all these encouraging women who will be featured these next couple months.
Enjoy!
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Hey y'all! My name is Ashley and I blog over at 5ohWifey: life as a mommy and cop's wife. I am amazed every day by what God is doing in my life. I am a southern girl now living in California against my will. I am the wife of 5ohHubby who is a police officer and wonderful man and no that's not mutually exclusive. I am a stay at home mom to an amazing little girl I call 5ohBaby and she is my whole world. We have probably the cutest, ugly dog out there (5ohPup).  
I try to blog about what I know. I try to keep it as real as possible. I blog about everything from holding on tight to my little one to the time I accidentally fed her jalapenos. I write about both the joys and the stresses of being in a police marriage. I love to cook and even make my own baby food. Sometimes I get a little crafty and dabble in fashion posts. I always say that I want my blog to be a place where we can laugh together, cry together, and just be real with one another.
But am I being real? Does anyone really know me from reading my blog?
 When you look at my blog, any blog really, it might seem like we lead these perfect whimsical lives. Our children are always well dressed and smiling, our hair is always just so, our husbands make prince charming eat his heart out and the only thing more spotless than our house is our spiritual walk . Or so it seems.
Everyone knows, or should know, that a blog is just a small part of a person's life that they're sharing with the world. But why is it always this part? This pleasantville-picture-perfect-leave-it-to-beaver life?
Because people out here on the internet judge you based on it. I have a blogging friend who has readers literally dedicate hours to leave nasty comments and write negative posts about her on other websites. I have other blogging friends who have their parenting questioned or their love for their children. Another friend who writes about her journey with weight loss and is worried about posting her actual weight on her site because she knows her high school friends read her blog. I know for myself, people at my husband's job scrutinize every single word I write, often in the hopes of finding something to mock 5ohHubby for.
And that's why we only share this tiny sliver.
Because we are afraid.
Afraid of what people might think.
Afraid of what might be said about us.
Afraid of people judging us.
Afraid of people mocking us.
Afraid that if people knew who we really were, what our house and our lives really looked like then they wouldn't accept us.
So we pose our lives, pose our children, and sometimes even convince our hubby's to pose. Everything is clean and bright and perfect.
But that's not how God sees us.
And it's a good thing, too.
Because, no matter what it usually looks like on my blog, I'm not perfect.
I don't have it all together and neither does my family.
 My daughter isn't always smiling.
My husband works long, hard, weird hours so he misses a lot of events.
Sometimes we skip church, even if we don't have a good reason.
Sometimes my house looks like this.
Ok, a lot of the time.
But the cool thing is, God knows me.
And He loves me anyways.
So, that's where I find who I am.
Not in my stats. Not in my comments.
Not in the "me" I choose to share with the internet, but in Him. 

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